Becoming Aware of the Father Influence and Healing Relationships with Men


A case presented by Jelena Ivanovic, Serbia

Jelena Ivanovic is a dentist who works in private practice. She has been a practicing flower essence therapist for two years now. She mostly uses them with her clients in her private practice.

R.M. is a student, 30 years old, living with her mother and a brother. She has no contact with her father. In her opinion, she is making bad relationship choices because of the bad relationship with her father (they have not had contact since her parents divorced). Typically, she feels anger and bitterness towards her partners.

Her first formula included:

Baby Blue Eyes – for rigid and cynical attitude, loss of childlike innocence due to bad relationship with father in childhood

Sunflower – for disturbed animus, for improving relationship with father

Poison Oak – fear of intimate relationships withothers, hypersensitivity that is covering up with anger and aggressive behaviors,

Willow – deeply seated anger that leads to bitterness

Awareness of the influence of past relationship with the father

During the first follow up R.M. says that she thinks about her absent father less than before. Also, she thinks that she is partially to blame for bad relationships with partners, because she is too hungry for emotions from her father and in her relationships she wants the same. When she does not get emotional support, she is angry and vindictive. In other words, she has the same behavioral pattern in all her relationships with partners. R.M. complains a lot about her low self esteem in male company of any kind. Also, she says that she has fear of remaining alone in life, because so far, she has not been able to have a successful relationship with a man.

The next formula included:

Pine – for self blame, self criticism, taking blame for objective circumstances

Larch – for promoting her self respect, for self limiting instead of self promoting

Chicory – for unselfishness in expressing love, against possesiveness and seeking love through negative attention

Aspen – for anxiety

Black-Eyed-Susan – for insight into the "shadow" of her unconsciousness, to avoid the tendency to suppress traumatic experiences and emotions

Shadow consciousness is aroused

R.M. is reporting lack of self esteem, no motivation for studying, tiredness due to insomnia, a very active mind during the night, with a lot of chaotic thoughts that keep her awake till morning, and only then she is able to get some sleep. She is now awake during the nights and sleeps during the day and that is promoting her laziness, which she cannot tolerate because she needs to study for her exams.

The formula for R.M. included:

White Chestnut – for insomnia due to different thoughts at night

Morning Glory – for overcoming destructive habit, for developing a lifestyle based on healthy life rhythms.

Tansy – for low motivation, lethargy, procrastination, for developing motivation for study and work

Buttercup – for self respect and developing self value

R.M. reports that she is sleepy earlier than before and that her sleeping is better but not completely. She remains lazy concerning her studies. The new symptom is fear of failure. When she is nervous, she smokes more then before and she would like to quit that habit.

The new formula included:

Larch – for procrastination and low self esteem

Morning Glory – for disturbed life cycles, addictions

Nicotiana  – for suppression of emotions in the background of smoking addiction
Clematis – daydreaming, too abstract ideas and plans, helps for focusing on the here and now

Blackberry – for more active and directive action, fulfilling her visions

Morning Glory

R.M: reports that she quit smoking. She said that she was not a very active smoker anyway, but she’d had that habit for over a year. She is going to bed earlier and wakes up earlier, but she is feeling tired when she is up, and she is still lazy in regard to studying. She has no enthusiasm and will for studying. Instead of studying, she is daydreams that she already has passed the exam.

California Wild Rose – against apathy, for enthusiasm in life

Cayenne – for lethargy and blocked will power, for action

Clematis – for daydreaming and procrastination

Olive – for extreme tiredness

Peppermint – mental lethargy, for mental laziness


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